I’m Kristen. Welcome to All In My Twenties, my place to pour my little heart out on the daily!! This is the world just as I see it. Why dont you kick up your feet and stay awhile?!
Hey there lovies!
Happy Monday.
Cant believe the weekends already gone, but on a positive note this girl has this week to work and then will be off for 2 WEEKSSSS on vacation.
Words cannot describe the excitement I feel!
Yay for Dallas and yay for the Bahamas!
{Still trying to get her butt before then!!}
I had a wonderful weekend, but more on that later.
Today Im going to preach a little reminder we all need to hear every now and then.
You know Im good at that.
To be honest, sharing them with you seems to help keep me on track too, which is why I do it!
This one is about Friendship.
friend.ship
NOUN
1. the mutual feelings of trust and affection and the behavior that typify relationships between friends
2. a relationship between people, organizations, or countries that is characterized by mutal assistance, approval and support
3. a relationship between two or more people who are friends
This definition probably isnt news to any of you.
The reason Im sharing it today is because sometimes I think people lose sight of what being a "good friend" truly entails. Im completely aware that all relationships have their ups and downs. Thats life. And no we arent always going to see eye to eye with our friends but I think we need to all be thankful and appreciative of those friends we count on to be there always. And I think we should all try a little harder to be supportive, affectionate and loving at least 90% of the time. No one is perfect nor is any friendship, but I think if we tried harder to be nicer and to be the best friend we can be more often, our friendships would be the best they can be.
Most importantly, and the whole reason Im talking about this today, I think as a friend you need to know when NOT to be "truthful". Sometimes saying nothing at all is better than being "truthfully" mean to your friends. You may not agree with them and you may want to be brutally honest, but sometimes holding your tongue will benefit both you, and your friendship, far more. I think some people take the "Im just being honest" approach when they should be taking the "Im just going to stay silent" stand. Just because youre a "best friend" does NOT give you the right to say MEAN hurtful things even if they are honestly how you feel. This is something I think we all need to keep in mind because sometimes its the little snide remarks that really HURT and thats NOT why we have friends. No one wants to feel attacked or hurt by the ones who are suppose to love them the most.
So the next time youre in a shitty mood or youre irritated, try and refrain from taking it out on the ones you love most. Take a moment and remember why you call that person your "best friend" and then shut your trap because a REAL best friend wouldnt want to hurt their feelings.
Just a thought to keep in mind.
Thats all for today friends!!
I love this! It's so important to be a good friend, and a lot of people take that for granted!!
ReplyDeleteAwwww girl, I totally agree with you. Sometimes not saying anything is so much better than the truth.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry if someone hurt your feelings or if you witnessted someone hurting someone else's feelings. I do think people take the "honesty is the best policy" as an avenue to be able to say whatever they want.
If a friend is hurting themselves or someone else, then yes honest is #1, but if it's just an opinion, kepe ya trap shut!
Heart you! xoxo
You are 100% right! I really try not to sugar coat things when talking to my "best friends" but at the same time I need to remember to add a little sweetness and not be so brutally honest! Thank you for doing posts like this :)
ReplyDeleteI love this!! You are so right. It's kinda like when we were kids and are told if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. I try to live it. Friendships are tough and you should always support each other and sometimes that means keeping quiet.
ReplyDeleteLove this post!! I am one to always speak my mind and especially to my besties. That said, I always try to take their feelings into consideration and just try to approach touchy subjects in private and with respect.
ReplyDeletePS The Bahamas is our home away from home - LOVE that place!!!
Love this! And everything you said is right on the money. Honesty is a great thing and is very important, but sometimes it's definitely better to zip your lips!
ReplyDeleteperfect! I loved this post and I am probably going to share it if thats okay!
ReplyDeletexoxo
Can you send my ex "bff" this damn post? F'realz.
ReplyDeleteOne of the benefits of being "older" (or, just plain old...if I'm being honest. HA!), is learning some important lessons along the way. Such as, "you do not have always have to share your opinion." Especially when it's something hurtful and no real good will come from "sharing." The sooner that people get this, the better relationships will be. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the friendship reminder and good luck on getting that behind. I am trying to get it too!
ReplyDeleteAnd oftentimes when you want to say something, it's a situation that will ultimately involve the friend having to realize things for what they are ... and she'll have to figure it out on her own. Then - when she needs you, you can be there. Good post!
ReplyDeleteLove, love, love this! I think we can all use little reminders such as this, especially when it comes to our besties. We want to be honest and truthful with them, but we also want to be considerate of who they are, their feelings, and remember we LOVE them!
ReplyDeleteWHO HURT MY BEAR???? I'll sic em for ya! ;)
ReplyDeleteLOVES YOU to the moon and back!! (PS-My ass is ever-growing these days so there won't be any of those ass shots any time soon. If there is it will be of YOUR smokin' skinny ass!)
You are so right and that's great advice love! It's easy to be snarky to the people your closest to and I know I've done it before! Thanks for the reminder to be a better friend :)
ReplyDeletebe more affectionate? So you want me to make out with my girlfriends?!?
ReplyDeleteNot sayin' there's a problem with that....
Amen to that Kristen! I have friends that struggle with this, but I too struggle with this because I am a naturally blunt person. Le sigh.
ReplyDeleteHave a good week!
It's also important that if you aren't going to say something to your friend about the things you may not agree with, don't go and tell everybody else... that is even worse because hearing that someone you trusted is talking about you behind your back is even worse, even if your intention was to avoid hurting someone's feelings.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I think sometimes people don't realize that they can be hurtful in the name of honesty.
ReplyDeleteHa! I can identify with this. Had a "friend" a few years back whose response to me saying I didn't like a recent photo of myself was "Well, you could go on a diet, you know."
ReplyDeleteNo, I didn't know that. Really??? It was a series of her saying mean things and then feigning innocence under the guise of "just being honest" but that was the last straw. Pretty much ended that friendship.
Years later, I am 30 lbs lighter and she is 30 lbs heavier. Hmmm...karma, maybe??
I really really really want to forward this to a friend. She'd be there if I needed her, but she constantly makes ppl feel bad because she's just "being honest."
ReplyDeleteWow Im dealing with something way too similar to this post right now. Nicely put!
ReplyDeleteOMG that whole paragraph about being "truthful"...yes yes yes! I pride myself on being a pretty damn honest person, but I am *not* brutally honest. I will tell people things that they don't want to hear, but I'm not mean about it. Conversely, recently someone I thought of as a best friend decided she didn't like some of the things I was doing/decisions I was making...and wrote me a really nasty Facebook message. Though nothing I was doing affected her in ANY WAY, she called me some pretty awful names, accused me of doing things I actually had NOT done, aaand kicked me out of her wedding (I was supposed to be a bridesmaid). All this without any warning whatsoever that she even had a problem with me. So. Yeah. Not cool.
ReplyDelete